Heavenly Peace
by standing-in-the-doorway
Summary: Buffy and Angel attend the same Christmas party. Set in Season 4Season 1.


Notes: Timeline is Christmas time in Season 4/Season 1. Riley is not an issue. Rating is T+, some sexual stuff towards the end but not too explicit.

Lyrics are from Juliana Hatfield's "Make It Home".

* * *

Buffy smoothed her dress down over her hips as she stared at her reflection. She was wearing a black tube dress with spaghetti straps that accentuated all the right parts of her figure and black strappy heels. Her hair was held in french twist by red and gold chopsticks with a few curled tendrils hanging down. Her jewelry, matching silver chains around her wrist and neck and tiny silver cross earrings, was simple, but all in all she looked beautiful and elegant. 

But she didn't really care. Spending Christmas vacation with her father meant attending the holiday party of one of his law firm's wealthy clients. It meant plastering on a fake smile while her father introduced her to a bunch of people he wanted to impress and eating all the cocktail weenies in an attempt to alleviate her boredom.

"Are you ready, sweetie?" a male voice called from the other side of her door.

"Yeah, Dad, I'll be right out." She grabbed her bag, positioned her lacy black throw over her bare arms and left.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As cynical as she had been about this party, Buffy was actually impressed by the gala. She stepped out of the car only to have it whisked away by a valet. She was standing in front a huge mansion just outside the Los Angeles city limits, the expansive exterior of which was covered in lavish Christmas decorations. Buffy and her father were led into the mansion with a group of immaculately dressed party-goers. The interior of the building was just as magnificently decorated as the outside. Garlands, pine trees, and twinkling white lights turned the party rooms into a festive wonderland. Two enormous dining rooms and a equally large ballroom were filled with people who were chattering happily over the holiday music filtering through what was surely a top of the line sound system. Making their way into one of the dining rooms, Hank Summers spotted someone he knew and dragged Buffy over to meet him.

"Tom, hey," Hank called.

"Hello Hank." The two men shook hands.

"This is my daughter, Buffy." Buffy shook hands with the man.

"So Buffy, where are you going to school now?" Tom asked making polite conversation.

"UC Sunnydale," she replied, fake smile firmly in place. "I just finished my first semester." The polite conversation covered more superficial topics, ranging from the party to the unusually cold weather until Hank saw someone else he knew and took Buffy over to meet him as well. Buffy wasn't sure how long this process went on, she tuned most of it out and just nodded and smiled when it was appropriate.

"Buffy, see that man over there?" her father asked her, pointing to a homely looking, pudgy guy sitting by himself. Buffy nodded her recognition. "That's our host, David Nabbit. He's an extremely important client of the firm. Let's go say hello."

"Actually, Dad, I think I'm going to get get a drink." She made her way to the bar which was between the dining room and ballroom.

"Red wine please," she asked the bartender, thankful that they didn't card her. As she turned from the bar, drink in hand, she crashed into the person behind splashing the red liquid onto the front of his tux. "Oh jeez, I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed, blotting at the stain.

"It's quite alright, Buffy." The Slayer's head shot up at the sound of the British voice.

"Wesley?" she asked.

"Hello."

"Oh wow. I mean, hi. I mean, what are you doing here?"

"I was invited. David Nabbit is a client of ours."

"Ours?" Buffy questioned, taking a sip of her wine.

"Yes, I've been working with Angel and Cordelia." Buffy made a concerted effort not to spit out her wine all over Wesley's already stained suit.

"What?" she asked in shock.

"After the Ascension, the Council, um," Wesley cleared his throat, "let me go. I continued to hunt demons and ended up working on the same case as Angel and we've been working together every since."

"Are they," Buffy asked her eyes darting around the room, "are they here?"

"Yes," Wesley answered slowly, his dense mind finally realizing the implications of Buffy and Angel in the same building. "Angel's in the dining room, and Cordelia is flitting around somewhere trying to land herself a rich husband." Buffy smiled at his last comment but her mind was racing. She had been feeling slightly off all night and now she knew why. Angel was here. She stared into her wine glass, not sure what she should say or do next.

"Buffy?" a voice said from behind her. She turned to find her father and a man she didn't recognize. "This is my boss, Nicholas Styler. Nick this is my daughter, Buffy."

"Pleased to meet you."

"Bye Buffy," Wesley said slipping away.

"Who was that?" her father asked as he walked away.

"No one," Buffy told him. "Just someone I used to know in Sunnydale." Someone she used to know, she repeated to herself. Of the past. Wesley and more importantly Angel was of the past. So she tried to ignore the fact that her heart was beating overtime, her stomach was all topsy turvy, and all she wanted was to find the vampire that had haunted her dreams since he left her.

It had been a little over an hour since Buffy had run into Wesley. She had continued her polite conversations with her father's colleagues but her heart and mind just weren't in it as they were occupied by thoughts of a certain vampire who was only a few rooms away. Finally, she excused herself to get another drink. Originally aiming for the bar, she shifted directions so that she was headed across the ballroom to the second dining room where she assumed Angel was. Making her way across the ballroom, her mind was in turmoil over the decision she had just made. She wanted to see Angel; she'd been feeling pulled to him all night. However, last time she had seen him she had told him she hadn't wanted to see him. And if she went to him now it wouldn't only dredge up feelings she couldn't deal with while attending a Christmas party with her father. Halfway across the ballroom, she changed her mind and turned around. She was headed for the bar and the relief a stiff drink would bring when a cool hand on her arm stopped her.

"Angel," she whispered, the sight of him before her, stunning in his tux, taking her breath away.

"Buffy," he said almost shyly. "Um, Wesley told me you were here." She nodded absently, still drinking in the view of him. He continued. "I, well, would you like to dance?" Buffy would have found his awkwardness endearing if she hadn't felt so unsure herself. Despite everything, she found herself agreeing to his request. Stepping into his arms amidst the other couples already dancing to the slow Christmas carol, Buffy reveled in, at the same time trying to ignore, the familiar feeling of rightness and safety she felt in his embrace.

_//Deep in the night_  
_I think on a time_  
_All was bright_  
_Here in this dark place_  
_I see in your face_  
_All is not right//_

As the song continued, Angel found himself unconsciously pulling his love closer. She didn't resist, instead resting her head on his shoulder. It was Christmas. They could allow themselves this one moment, this one song.

_//Make it, make your way home_  
_Better than the last_  
_Break it, break the alone_  
_Take a second chance//_

The song seemed to extend forever. Time was limitless when they were together. But finally the last strains of the song faded away and the star-crossed couples extracted themselves from each other's arms. Glancing up at the ceiling in order to gather the strength to walk away from her once again, Angel noticed something that made him smile. During the dance, they had drifted to a more secluded area of the dance floor.

"Buffy, look up," he told her softly. She did as he commanded and gasped quietly when she realized they were under a sprig of mistletoe.

"Ang..." Her words were cut off by his lips on hers. They kissed tenderly but not without passion. Their mouths met with quiet desperation, wanting more but being denied the full expression of their love. Angel's large hands spanned Buffy's petite waist, holding her close as her delicate fingers roamed his broad shoulders and neck and tangled in his short dark hair. Finally with her human need to breath, Buffy pulled back in order to pull air into her lungs.

"Buffy," Angel whispered, longing making his voice deep and husky.

"Angel!" a female voice, not Buffy's, called breaking the private world they had fallen into. Buffy recognized the voice as Cordelia's and couldn't stick around to face her or the inevitable rejection from Angel. She slipped from his embrace and ran off as the brunette made her way across the dance floor to inadvertently thwarting any attempts Angel could have made to stop his fleeing lover.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Now dressed in blue flannel pajamas decorated with penguins and hair flowing loosely around her shoulders, Buffy sat on the bed in the guest room of her father's apartment wondering how her life had gotten so out of control. She wasn't even 19 yet and already she had her heart battered, bruised, and broken more times than she cared to think about. Tonight just added a chapter to the Big Book of Buffy's Unsuccessful Love Stories.

'Well,' she sighed, 'I guess it's just my way of cramming a lifetime of pain into a Slayer's life span.' With the thought of being the Slayer filling her head, she quickly changed into jeans, a sweater, and a coat and slipped out the window onto the fire escape. 'I can't sleep anyway, might as well get some slaying done. Just because I can't be happy on Christmas, doesn't mean I can't prevent other people from feeling the pain of losing a loved one.'

_//Open a window_  
_Let in the snow_  
_Cold is all I know_  
_Go to the fire_  
_Stir it around_  
_There's a warmer place for you to go//_

She wandered the streets of Los Angeles aimlessly, finding very few vampires out and about. She staked two who were lurking by a 24-hour shopping center hoping to prey on last minute shoppers, but a half hour after that kill she decided to give up.

Walking back across the city to her father's apartment, Buffy began to shiver as the wind picked up and swirled coldly around her. She wrapped her scarf more securely around her neck and pulled her gloves out of her pocket. As she slide her chilly hands into the blue wool, she was surprised to find white flakes beginning to fall around her.

After her mind processed the fact, that it was indeed snowing and even sticking to the ground, she decided that she didn't want to go home quite yet.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Angel was sitting in his living room reading when he heard the knock at his door. Thinking it was Cordelia or Wesley with an emergency he rushed to answer it but did not find what he was expecting.

"Buffy."

"Hi." He was surprised to see her at all, but was even further surprised by the snowflakes sticking in her hair causing it to curl wetly around her smiling face. "Come outside," she told him. "It's snowing." Without waiting for an answer, she turned and walked back outside. Without being given a choice, he followed.

_//So, make it, make your way home_  
_Better than you have_  
_Break it, break the alone_  
_Leave it in the past//_

Angel stepped outside to find the fast falling snow had already covered the ground thickly. Glancing around at the winter wonderland, his gaze fell on Buffy, with her eyes closed and head tilted back, catching a snowflake on her tongue.

"Usually doesn't snow in California," he stated.

"Did last year," she told him, meeting his gaze with her penetrating green eyes.

"Must be el Nino," he explained pathetically, immediately looking away from his intense stare.

"I don't think so."

"Buffy," he started, but she shushed him.

"No talking. Come make a snowman with me," she commanded. She didn't want him to tell her to stop her girlish thinking that the magical snowfall was for them. All she wanted was to make a snowman with the man she loved and she didn't that was too much to ask at Christmastime. Angel joined her in the snow and wordlessly began rolling the base of the snowman.

A few minutes later, they had finished their creation. Standing back and looking at it with appreciation, Angel asked "Want some tea?" She nodded and they went back inside.

Buffy sat at the kitchen table as Angel went about making the tea. She studied his apartment, finding it familiar but dismissing the strange feeling. Nothing about this night had been un-strange. Why start questioning it now? Angel handed her a mug and she gratefully sipped the warm liquid from it.

"Buffy," Angel started once again.

"Please don't Angel, just don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't tell me I shouldn't be here. How we can't work out. Any of that."

"That wasn't what I was..."

"Please," she interrupted, "just let me have a few moments of peace with you - call it a Christmas present if you want." She looked at him imploringly. "After that I'll leave but for now, can we just sit here quietly, drinking our tea and pretend things are like they used to be?"

_//Look and you'll find it_  
_Someone wants to love you_  
_Look and you'll find it_  
_Someone wants to love you//_

"But things aren't like they used to be," he told her, taking the seat next to her, removing the hot mug from her hands and resting it on the table. "Wesley told me something tonight. He thinks I can't lose my soul again." Buffy's jaw dropped.

"How? When?"

"He thinks when Willow recursed me she didn't include the happiness clause."

"All this time, we could have been together..." Buffy murmured distraught, looking down at the table.

"Hey," he said lifting her chin so she was looking him in the eye. "We're together now. We can make up for lost time."

"You mean it?" Buffy asked, her eyes lighting up like a child's on Christmas morning. He nodded. "You still love me?"

"With all my heart," he replied, taking her hands in his.

"And you want me?"

"More than anything," he told her sincerely, a new huskiness creeping into his tone. She slid from her seat on to his lap.

"This is all I could of asked for for Christmas." Emotion colored her voice. "Make love to me Angel." Her soft plea filled the kitchen setting them adrift into the magical world of desire and love that had so long been closed off to them. Lifting her small body in his strong arms Angel carried her to his bedroom.

Setting her down on the bed, he slowly, reverently undressed her. Each newly revealed inch of skin was greeted by Angel's cool mouth until her entire glorious body was revealed to his hungry eyes. Flushing slightly under his devouring gaze, Buffy pulled him up for a kiss before flipping them and showering him with the same loving attentions he had given her. When they were both nude, Angel pulled back his sheets and settled them both underneath.

Mouths met with greedy kiss as hands roamed long untouched skin until they could wait no longer. Positioning himself above her, Angel gazed down into her trusting green eyes.

"I love you."

"I love you too." He slid slowly inside her catching her gasp with his kiss. They moved tenderly in a rhythm as old as time until they reached the pinnacle together, crying out each other's names. Throughout the night, they fulfilled desires long denied until they were both exhausted.

"Merry Christmas, Buffy," Angel whispered into the dark as they drifted off to sleep.

"Merry Christmas, Angel," she whispered back. Snuggled against his chest, her body sated and slightly sore, she felt something she hadn't felt in a long time. Peace.

_//Wake it, wake your dream_  
_One forgotten me_  
_Sleepin' deep inside of you_  
_Heavenly peace//_


End file.
